It’s been nearly a month since I last updated the blog. Long enough for it to feel overgrown. Lately, too many things have been happening at once, and I’ve been more or less running on mental overload.
Saying goodbye to Xinpu for good
In September, I finally sold my last apartment in Xinpu.
It was my first home, and I had lived there for five years, so naturally it meant more to me than just another property. The transfer process and the buyer’s loan paperwork took a full day to handle. Then came another two weeks of waiting before the loan was finally disbursed yesterday and everything was fully settled.
That was the final break. After eight years of working and living around Xinpu, I’m now completely disconnected from that chapter of life.
The night before moving out on Sunday, I invited a former boss and a few close friends to dinner. It felt like a proper farewell meal. After that, I stayed out drinking with two old buddies until well past midnight. We talked about those younger years, looked back on all the things we had been through, sighed over how quickly time passes, and talked a little about the future too.
By middle age, even when everyone is doing reasonably well, people still end up revisiting the past. And in those conversations, sooner or later, you always hear a few quiet sighs.
How fragile life really is
I also went back to Hezhang with my wife because one of her relatives passed away.
He had been surviving on dialysis for two or three years. In the end, the doctors said continuing treatment no longer meant anything. With no other option, he was taken home and held on for more than a week, sustained only by the will to live.
People around him all said that when someone is about to leave, they somehow know it themselves.
Before he died, he kept asking to be taken to the hospital for dialysis. On the day he passed, his family told him the doctors had said there was no way to continue dialysis, and that everything after his passing had already been arranged, so he could go in peace. He simply replied: “Alright then, I’ll go.”
I keep thinking about what that final stretch must feel like. Your whole family is gathered around, waiting for your last breath so that the next steps can begin. You know the doctors have already given up hope. And still, with nothing left but the instinct to survive and the fear of death, you keep trying to hold on, even though you can do nothing. There is something unbearably helpless and desperate in that.
There’s a reason people often say we should care well for the living and keep funerals simple. In the end, it comes down to this: while a person is still here, let them eat what they want, enjoy what they can, and live a few more good days. That matters far more than burning more paper after they’re gone.
A weekend trip to Xifeng’s brick-themed playground
Over the weekend, a friend asked us to bring the kids along to Xifeng. A new brick-themed playground had opened there.
The first thing I noticed was that parking was a hassle. But once we got inside, none of that mattered to the children. The place had everything to pull them in at once: giant slides three or four stories high, trampolines, rope bridges, sand areas, a pirate ship, and more. The kids had the time of their lives and were so absorbed that by the end they flat-out refused to leave.
As a side note, the zaojiao fish near the Xifeng toll station was unbelievably good. Compared with spicy chicken, it wins by a mile.
Heading to Guangzhou for the holiday
On the 29th, a little after seven in the morning, I’ll be taking my son to Guangzhou to see the sea.
He has been excited about it for a long time. He’s always wanted to fly on a plane and go see the ocean. He was born right when the pandemic began, and with everything that followed, plus how busy life has been, we never managed to take him. This time I adjusted my duty schedule on purpose so I could take him out properly and let him enjoy the trip.
There will definitely be crowds, but I’m still looking forward to it. I just hope it turns into a happy holiday for all of us.
And with Mid-Autumn Festival and National Day around the corner, I hope everyone has a good one.